Creating Capable and Hardworking Helpers

June 15, 2021
Jessica // Three Rivers Homestead
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Jessica is a homesteading and homeschooling mother of seven living in northwest Ohio. She has a passion for encouraging other mothers to grow and preserve nutritious food for their families.

Over the last month my family has been plagued by several different illnesses and a pretty severe injury. This can be a challenge for every mother, let alone a mother in charge of managing a homestead. No matter how sick we are, animals still need cared for and gardens still need tended if we expect them to survive.

I feel very grateful that as I was lying sick in bed and/or caring for my injured toddler for nearly three straight weeks, the entire homestead didn’t fall apart, because I have very capable helpers in my children. Now, they aren’t perfect helpers and they don’t always do the chores exactly as I would, but they can keep the ship afloat for me and that’s what matters.

If you’re busy mother chances are there is going to be a point where you need to rely on the help of your children to get the jobs done. If you’re like me, you may even expect them to help with the work on regular days when you aren’t facing extreme circumstances.

Here are some of the ways I encourage my children to want to help the family with the homestead chores:

1) START THEM YOUNG. Toddlers love to be made to feel useful, so as soon as they are old enough to shadow me, they begin accompanying me on all of my chores. If it’s a chore that an older child has taken over for me, the toddlers accompany their sibling. We try to involve them in any tasks that they’re capable of helping with. It doesn’t take long for little ones to want to do those tasks themselves and eventually take them over.

2) MAKE IT EASY FOR THEM. You have to set your children up for success in their chores. This means providing them with the proper attire. Comfortable children will be more likely to want to help. They need to be warm in the winter, safe from pests and weed rashes in the garden, or protected from injury if they are around large livestock. Setting them up for success also means that things like fencing, gates, and feeders aren’t too complicated for them to maneuver on their own.

3) GIVE THEM FREEDOM. Don’t micromanage the little things. Let them figure out a way to do the chores that make sense for them and they’re much more likely to complete those tasks effectively. Just make sure that you are checking in once in a while so everything is getting done. I do that by job-shadowing them once a week or every other week. They really enjoy being my “boss” and directing me in the chores.

4) GIVE THEM PRAISE. I like to remind my children quite often how essential they are and how important the work they do for us is. We talk about our family being like a team and how we need every player to make the team work. In my experience, children that are made to feel necessary are more likely to want to go above and beyond to help out.

5) GIVE THEM BREAKS. Everyone can experience burnout. I know that as a mother even I have days where it’s hard to remain motivated. How much harder must it be for children on some days? Providing them with days off and reminding them of how much they’ve earned it because they’re such hard workers can go a long way for future motivation.

6) WORK HARD YOURSELF. If children see you working hard on a daily basis while they are doing their chores, they will view their help as necessary. If they see you slacking and being unproductive while they’re hard at work doing the chores, they may begin to feel resentful about the work. Model the behavior you want to see in your children.

7) LET THEM HAVE OWNERSHIP. I asked my children to give me some insight on what motivates them to get their work done. The consensus seemed to be that having some ownership in the homestead helps. For example, my girls enjoy helping in the garden because I’ve allowed them to help me make decisions on planting and organizing things. They feel like the garden is partially theirs, so they are invested in the work.

And my older sons, who handle most of the animal chores, enjoy dealing with the animals because they’ve been given opportunities to make decisions about them. They’re allowed to keep favorite hatchlings and have been given naming privileges most of the time. In many ways, they feel like the animals are theirs, and since they are bonded to them, they want to do the work to care for them.

As I mentioned before, my children are not perfect helpers. How could they be? I am definitely not the perfect homestead mama! But my children have a heart for helping because they have been given the opportunity to do so for as long as they can remember.

I can’t stress enough the importance of involving your children in your work so that they know exactly what needs to be done to keep the homestead running. You never know when life will throw you a curve ball and you might not be able to get out there and get the chores done yourself. Having capable children as a backup is priceless to you, and is one of the biggest gifts that you can give THEM for their future.

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